Have you ever heard of the Butterfly Effect theory? For those that haven’t, the phrase refers to the idea that a butterfly's wings might create tiny changes in the atmosphere that may ultimately alter the path of a tornado or delay, accelerate or even prevent the occurrence of a tornado in a certain location. The flapping wing represents a small change in the initial condition of the system, which causes a chain of events leading to large-scale alterations of events (i.e. domino effect). Had the butterfly not flapped its wings, the trajectory of the system might have been vastly different. While the butterfly does not "cause" the tornado in the sense of providing the energy for the tornado, it does "cause" it in the sense that the flap of its wings is an essential part of the initial conditions resulting in a tornado, and without that flap that particular tornado would not have existed.

Now why am I going on about butterflies and tornadoes you may well ask. Well let’s take the principal of the theory – doing something at the right time in the right place, or the wrong time and wrong place (or even right place wrong time or wrong place right time!) The mind boggles! Whatever we do has consequences – just like a butterfly flapping its wings can potentially help to cause a devastating tornado somewhere else… or avert it – so too do our thoughts and actions.

Remember whatever we think produces energy which we project out into the world. If it’s negative thoughts we’re thinking then the energy we’re sending out will also be negative – the same for positive thoughts. Our thoughts and feelings about people send them energy – whether positive or negative. It’s worth thinking about that our one negative thought or action could potentially be the one final thing that causes them to tip over the edge (the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back). This is why it is so absolutely key to monitor our thoughts and feelings about people. Do we really want to have to take responsibility for being the person who created the thought that helped someone hit rock bottom?

It’s better to take responsibility for our thoughts, feelings, and actions right now and make sure we alter our thinking from negative to positive as soon as we notice it. One thing I would add to this – if you notice yourself feeling angry or resentful (or some other negative feeling) about a person or situation don’t immediately beat yourself up for it. Acknowledge that you’re thinking it, let it go and choose to think something more positive that makes you feel better. Beating yourself up and feeling negative about yourself is just transferring the negative thoughts back onto you. The butterfly effect can work on ourselves too – that’s a key thing to understand. Don’t allow yourself to be the butterfly-wing flap that causes you to tip the balance.

Many people, when they realise they’ve done or said something that has helped to cause upset in someone else’s life immediately start beating up on themselves. The reasons for this can be two-fold: i) they genuinely do feel bad about it and ii) they can also fall into victim mode and beat themselves up publicly to get people to feel sorry for them. Again, here it’s best just to acknowledge what you’ve done wasn’t helpful, apologise, and then move on. Don’t belabour it. Remember, we don’t have to tell someone we’ve thought negative things about them – that could well be the wing flap that tips them over.

I realise there’s quite a bit to think about from this week’s musings and some of it will be uncomfortable because the ego-self likes to remind us of all the times when we have been negative. The butterfly effect can also be used in a positive way – the right comment at the right time can really help lift someone up. The key message here is: watch your thoughts and feelings and when you find yourself thinking and feeling negative breathe it out, let it go, and then find thoughts that feel much more positive. Love yourself for making that new choice.