Much of what we create in our lives we do with the help of other people – even if it’s not always obvious that this is the case. Take relationships for instance, we cannot have any kind of relationship with others unless they choose to as well. The power of our expectations and intentions also has a massive role to play in co-creating relationships. Let me give you an example.

As much as I hate to admit it, I initially had some unhelpful expectations about a gathering that I was attending recently. At first I was worrying about what would happen, whether I would get on with the people there, whether I would find anyone irritating etc. All perfectly human thought process – albeit governed by the Ego and not the Soul. You know what it’s like when this kind of thing happens, and we get ourselves into a right two and eight about it.

However, as the day drew closer I began working on myself and talking it through with my partner and we both managed to re-centre. At the end of the day, we decided just to have a good time and try to go with no preconceptions – which we did. We had a great time. One of the best days we’ve had for absolutely ages If I’d let my thoughts keep dwelling on the negative stuff I’m sure the day would have worked out a lot differently!

Here’s the thing…. When we expect someone to behave in a particular way, and build up that expectation in our head, then we are actually sending that person the energy and thoughts that help to fulfil that. We find ourselves looking for the behaviour that we really don’t want to see because that’s what we’re expecting to see – even if it isn’t there!

What’s that phrase? Let me think – something like: “If you look for the negative in people you will surely see it. If you look for the good in people, you will see that too” At the end of the day, the person we really would be better focusing upon is ourselves and our own connection to the God consciousness within. God consciousness is centred, loving, forgiving, non-judgmental, accept, joyful, fun, giving, etc etc. Surely it’s better intend to co-create relationships from this perspective rather than fear, anger, resentment, jealousy, envy, and judgment? Doesn’t it feel better to commit to looking for the best in people and seeing it rather than looking for the worst in people and feeling justified and making ourselves feel more superior because of the other person’s perceived faults?

It’s worth thinking about the relationships you have around you and, with loving and un-judgmental honesty, observe how you’re helping to co-create them. Are you coming from a loving and accepting stance or from one of judgment and superiority? Another phrase I love which I remind myself of from time to time “do you want to be right or do you want to love and be loved?”