"Love is a choice you make from moment to moment"
Barbara De Angelis

We are all more than what we do and what we actually see. Bear this in mind the whole time you read this musing and, indeed, for the rest of your life. For it is true – we are more than what we do.

A few experiences have really brought this to the front of my mind recently and I’d like to share them with you.

I was watching a drama on TV recently about a group of forensic pathologists who work with the police to solve crimes (Silent Witness). A recent episode was about gang culture and turf wars around London – no so very far from where I live. I found it quite disturbing to watch groups of youths gang raping girls to initiate them into the group, and also the senseless violence of stabbing each other to show prowess and mark territory. Now whilst this was just a television show, this kind of behaviour can be borne out just by listening to the news.

I found it quite shocking not only because of what I saw but also the anger, resentment and hidden prejudices I found within me. The latter upset me the most I think. I found myself getting quite fearful about being attacked given how close all these (well known) trouble spots are to where I live – in spite of the fact that I’ve lived here for 13 years without any problems whatsoever! The anger and resentment towards these groups was quite pronounced and that I find disturbing too. It was then that I heard in my head a calm voice saying “remember, we are all more than what we do and what we see”. This calm voice cut right through the fear and allowed me to become centred again.

The Ego is a thing that would have us stay in a place of fear and stagnation – not moving forward and needing to put others down to a) get ahead and b) make us feel good about ourselves. We attack when we feel threatened and we learn behaviour from what we see around us. These youths on the program were clearly acting in a way that they had learned from watching those around them, and also because behaving in that way made them feel better about themselves. Whether or not we agree with what they did it is what we can find ourselves doing when we don’t know any other way of making ourselves feel better and safer.

I have also witnessed a couple of arguments by people around me who have verbally attacked each other because they fear not being good enough and/or not being loved. This is the Ego in play again – making us believe that we need to behave this way in order to feel better about ourselves and to show others that we are worth more. When people are aggressive and attack all it is, in the grand scheme of things, is a cry for love.

This all stems from a place of fear of not being loved and worth loving. Simple as that. Underneath the Ego, is the beautiful Soul-Self that is connected to everyone and everything. That is who and what we truly are. When we Know this it becomes so much easier to show compassion, understanding, and forgiveness. It doesn’t mean that what the other person has done was right – just that it is their Ego and no who they really are. This means that we can continue loving them for the beautiful Soul that they are, forgive them for what they have done, and allow the hurt, grief, and anger to dissolve away.

The key message from this really is: choose to look past the Ego of those you meet and interact with, and, using your intention, connect with the amazingly beautiful Soul that lies in the centre. Do this for yourself too…. For that is the true essence of who we really are.