For those of you who partake (or have ever partaken) in the therapy of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) the phrase “I completely and deeply accept myself” will be no stranger to you. It’s a phrase I’ve been using whilst practicing EFT on myself and with clients for about 8 years (that’s a funny thought for me as I hadn’t realised it had been so long!). It’s a phrase that I had been saying, as part of that therapy, without totally acknowledging what I was really saying. I just knew that doing the tapping and saying the words, “Even though I xxx (insert issue, fear or block here) I deeply and profoundly accept myself, the issue being tapped upon began to release completely.

Now let me assure you this isn’t a big advert about EFT, although if it intrigues you enough to try it then brilliant!. It was that last sentence “I deeply and profoundly accept myself” that very recently has really begun to strike a cord with me.

When it comes to stresses, blocks, and fears in our life, how often have you found yourself pushing them away, denying them, hiding them, or just plain old ignoring them? I’ve done this countless times and done the whole “hiding one’s head in the sand” thing. Of course, on the surface everything appears all hunky dory (we like to think!) and yet underneath, deep in the subconscious, that little whirring machine is revolving round and round and round the issue or situation that’s really going on. Our subconscious wants us to notice what’s going on around and will do whatever it can to keep us alerted to it. Why? Because it’s trying to keep us safe!

Let’s face it, if you notice a poisonous snake slithering toward you and you just ignore it, hoping it will go away, you’re like to get end up wishing you hadn’t after it has bitten you!

Life is a bit like that too. Things happen around us that will often haven an impact upon our lives and the more we ignore it, the louder it gets. Just like a child that wants attention – his/her behaviour can often get more and more outrageous or aggressive until he/she is noticed. Our physical bodies behave similarly – the more we ignore a particular pain (hoping it will go away) the more the body will make us aware of it.

What’s the answer? Depends really on what the thing is that’s “shouting” to get your attention! But rest assured, if you ignore it, you can be your bottom dollar that it’ll come and bite you on your sweet ass at the least helpful or expected moment!

So let me take you right back to the beginning of this musing… I mentioned “I deeply and profoundly accept myself”. Just take a moment to think about that phrase. What does it mean to you? Do you really feel like you accept yourself completely and unconditionally? Perhaps you do. Perhaps you don’t. But, one thing you can do is accept that that’s just the way it is right now. Do you get that?! You may not accept yourself completely, but it is quite possible to accept that, right now, you don’t accept yourself completely and unconditionally.

Sit with that paragraph above for a minute or two and really allow it to ruminate. Denying that something is happening is one sure way of causing so much dis-ease (and I do mean Dis Ease, i.e. lack of ease) in your life that you make yourself ill. Not only that, you make yourself (and probably others around you) even more miserable.

A great amount of relief can be found in the statement “I accept what is”. It doesn’t mean you cannot change the situation, or that you’re giving up, or that you’re “less than”. It just means you’re totally aware and accepting of the situation as it is right now. You’re acknowledging it.

Just like with a child, or illness, the minute you start to acknowledge it, it can begin to calm down and change.

Acknowledging something and accepting that that’s the way it is right now, is not the same as dwelling on it and causing yourself to feel crappy and fearful. The former can be very self empowering as it’s often acknowledging a situation that’s the hardest part of beginning the change process! Once acknowledged, you can then find thoughts that feel better, to allow yourself to transform it to something so much better.

To summarise then… accept what is, no matter what it is, and then find thoughts that feel better in order to change your life to be more the way you want it to be.

“Even though my life isn’t the way I want it to be right now…. I deeply and profoundly accept myself anyway”. And so it is…