This wonderfully huge and diverse world on which we are physically abiding is full of different things. So many species living their lives in the way that they know how, because of instinct, because of the way they have been taught, and because of new ways they have learned to develop and evolve.

So much of what we, as humans, do is because of learned behaviours and patterns that are taught to us as we grow up. There are many things that we all have to do: eat, sleep, drink, go to the loo, breathe, etc. But, there are also many different ways of doing all of those things, even breathing! In the Far and South East, eating is done a lot of the time with chop sticks, in other places around the world with fingers, in the Western World cutlery. All these ways of eating can be seen in all parts of the world now – as the world evolves, grows, and adopts new ways of doing things. The thing here is, there is no “right” way of eating. Each to their own.

Of course, intellectually, we all understand that. Different ways of doing things appeal to different people. Indeed, people may actually adopt a different way of doing something depending on his/her mood! Just because we did something one way on one particular day, doesn’t mean we will do it the same way the following day.

While having a physical experience, many of us humans like regularity, routine, and the known. We can become uncomfortable with the unknown or with things that don’t behave as expected.

I was watching Pollyanna yesterday (the first one with Hayely Mills) which is a film I absolutely love. Bit twee in places I agree, but the messages within it, for me, are quite profound. A little girl, Pollyanna, moves to a remote town where people have been behaving in one particular way for so long that they’ve forgotten they can change. They’ve also grown so used to the way they all behave that they assume and presume that everyone else will also, and should also, behave that way too. Pollyanna turns up behaving quite differently from how they presumed she should and it turns their world upside down. She sets aside presumptions and assumptions about things and just happens to find things to be glad about, no matter what they are. That one little girl, through this acceptance of people and their differences, manages to help them see that they also can change things in their lives. Especially the things they don’t like, just by focusing upon the positives.

Here’s the thing, many of us, because of our own learned behaviours, assume that everyone else will (or should!) behave that way too. When they don’t, it upsets our world and we can either get angry and try to force them to change, or we can accept that they might do things differently. We might even have a go at trying their way – just for fun ;-) As long as someone isn’t hurting anyone else by the way they do things, does it really hurt us to allow someone to eat with their fingers? Or make loud gulping noises as they drink? Or have an accent that is different to our own? Or use (or not use as the case may be) grammatically correct wording with sentences which are no longer than about 12 – 15 words which do not go over more than about 2 lines because they’re trying to get so much into one sentence without stopping?

The point here is about never presuming or assuming anything about how somebody should or will behave, and that includes ourselves too! It’s worth noticing those times when you say to yourself “he should do it this way”, or “She didn’t act her age” or “I’m not allowed to do…..” etc. Then ask yourself, is there really anything detrimental about how a person does something that breaks with your own “rules” for doing things? Allow yourself to be more accepting of new ways of doing things and behaving. As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else, what’s the harm? Indeed, you could have a lot of fun trying something different. After all, isn’t life there for enjoying? (or is that just my presumption?